Sexting Tips: 60 Hot Sexting Ideas

If there’s one thing we love, it’s a good sext—and trust, we’ve seen plenty of bad ones in our day. That’s because sexting is an art form, a craft that must be honed and perfected. JK, it’s not that deep. But if you’re looking to improve your sexting game, you’ve come to right place. Here you’ll find all the very best sexting tips, ideas, and advice that we, your faithful Cosmo sexperts, have graciously compiled for your edification. Why? Because sexting is a great skill to have—not just because it’s an incredibly fun and hot way to pass the time but because sending (quality) sexts can actually help improve your relationship (and, of course, your sex life).

That’s right, in addition to being one of the hottest things you can do with your phone, sexting can be downright educational. In fact, Elizabeth Dell, a certified sex educator and founder of the relationship intimacy app Amorus, says sending (and receiving!) these sexy exchanges is one of the best ways to explore intimacy, pleasure, and sex as a whole.

“Humans are sensual beings who enjoy pleasure and sexuality. Sexting is talking about that pleasure with the person of your choice,” she explains. “It is great for turning you on, heating up your partner, exploring new ideas, and learning what excites you both.”

Not only is sexting a great way to get horny and/or exercise some of that sexual tension, but it’s also one of the best opportunities there is to communicate with your partner about sexual fantasies, desires, and boundaries—all in a fun and low-pressure kinda way.

“Sexting is great for exploring new ideas before you try to make anything real,” says Dell. “You can play with fantasy, and experiment/indulge in a safe space.”

So yeah, sexting is pretty great. But before we spill all our wisdom on how you can be great at it, let’s review the basics, shall we? Welcome to sext ed, baby! Class is in session.

What Is Sexting?

Basically, sexting (a portmanteau of “sex” and “texting,” duh), is exactly what it sounds like: the practice of exchanging sexy text messages with someone with the intention of getting each other all horned up.

While the concept is pretty straight forward, it can be a little confusing to try to narrow down what, exactly, constitutes a sext. Is it just photos and videos? Sultry, descriptive paragraphs that are basically erotic literature? Horny emojis? Are voice messages getting involved??

According to Jasmine Akins, a sexual health educator at CAN Community Health, it all counts. “Sexting is sending any sexual material (images, messages, memes, gifs, voice memos, etc.) via cell phone, email, instant message, DM (you get the idea),” she explains. So if it’s digital and sexy in nature—whether that’s via words or pics in your fave lingerie—it’s a sext.

So, yes, pretty much anything can be a sext. But what makes for a *good* sext? In our opinion, if you’re being honest and enthusiastic about what turns you on, chances are you’re probably already killing the sext game. That said, if you’re in the market for a little sexting inspiration, look no further. We have tons of hot sexting ideas that are just waiting to be sent to your lucky sext partner. But before we tell you *what* to send, there are a few things you need to keep in mind that’ll keep everything safe, consensual, and, ofc, sexy for everyone involved.

5 Expert-Approved Sexting Tips

1. Always ask for consent

Before you start snapping nudes, Akins says you need to make sure the other person is comfortable receiving your sexts in the first place. “Permission to send, permission to receive, and permission to continue sending and receiving are so important,” she says.

“Bring up that you want to explore sexting with your partner, [and] make sure you are comfortable sexting as well. You never should feel pressured to engage in sexting behavior.” (And if someone is putting on the pressure, consider that to be a major red flag and ditch them. Seriously.)

Another small but important note: Just because you got the go-ahead to sext once doesn’t mean you have a free pass to send explicit images at any time (unless that was already discussed). Again, you should be asking for consent every time, and always respect a partner’s boundaries or wants if they’re busy or not interested in sexting at that time.

Also remember that just like any type of in-person sex, you can change your mind about sexting at any time—even if you consented at the beginning, says Akins.

The best way to prevent any uncomfortable moments or transgressions is to continuously check in with your partner. It doesn't have to be complicated. In fact, it can literally be as simple as asking, "Do you like that?" or "How do you feel when I tell you I want to do this to you?"

2. Discuss your boundaries and what you'll do with the sexts afterward

Important things to talk about prior to getting dirty: Will you delete the messages immediately after the conversation, or is it okay to keep them on your phone? Is there anything you really do (or don’t) want to sext about? Are you comfortable receiving written texts? What about photos? What about audio messages?

Establish what you and your partner are and aren’t looking for in the sexy exchange to keep things fun and not creepy. Dell also says picking your sexting platform carefully is key here. You want to make sure you’re on a secure app that doesn’t download your photos, save them to your library/cloud, and has a secure privacy policy, especially if you’re sexting with someone new. (Tip: Try the Amorus app or Signal for a worry-free and safe sexting experience.)

3. Make your intentions clear

Before going down the sexting path, it’s important to make sure you’re on the same page regarding what, exactly, the sexts mean. Are you just flirty friends passing the time or are you looking for something more?

Sexting is still a form of intimacy, and it’s important to only engage in the activity with people you trust. Being open about what the interaction means will help ensure everything remains fun and consensual. In other words, if you're only looking for something casual or a FWB thing, make sure that's clear.

4. Ask questions!

Dell says this is her number-one, most important sexting tip. “When you ask a question, you tell your partner that their opinion, thoughts, and pleasure matter to you,” she explains. “It also lets them set their comfort level—if their reply is tame or wild, you’ll see what vibe they are feeling.”

In addition to establishing and maintaining consent throughout your convo, asking questions can also keep the conversation going and help you learn more about what turns your partner on. And because sexting—like all forms of sex, TBH—can occasionally have some awkward moments, a well-placed question like, “What makes that hot for you?” can even help you out when you find yourself unsure of how to respond.

5. Double-check before sending anything

You’ve heard the stories—a sext accidentally got sent to the parents when it was supposed to be sent to...well, not the parents. Akins says to always ensure you’re sending to the right recipient and turning off any automatic downloads. The last thing you want is your pics accidentally getting saved—or worse, uploaded to the “family photos” folder on your computer.

With all that being said, don’t stress! Remember, sexting is supposed to be fun. And if you do find yourself in an awkward sexting situation, Dell says your best possible bet is to simply be honest with your sext partner about what you’re feeling. “When you acknowledge that you’re both human and not going to be movie-perfect, you both have room to make mistakes, to laugh at yourselves, and to experiment—and that’s where the good stuff really happens,” she explains.

If you're ready for some inspiration, feel free to copy any of the very real sexting ideas we've rounded up for you below. We could not make these up if we tried, and trust, they are guaranteed to get the conversation going…